Hey friends,
 
I haven’t posted on here in quite some time, but I thought I would fill you guys in on something exciting in my life! I am going back to Amsterdam! It would be an understatement to say I am excited to get back to the Netherlands, but for lack better words...I AM EXCITED. Last year I got to spend my spring break in the city of Amsterdam helping a local church build the Kingdom in a city desperate for the love of God. I am posting today because I wanted to tell you guys about my missions trip there last year, and some familiar faces in the most unchartered place I’ve been thus far.
 
 
The second the plane landed in Amsterdam God stirred an anticipation and exhilaration in my heart for the people I would meet. I felt God sent me to the Netherlands with a purpose. I knew my mission’s trip would look a lot different than my friends who were going into the bush of Africa, but I knew without a doubt that God had me on that trip for a reason. The leaders and leaders at the church quickly became friends I knew I could never forget.
 
 
The entire staff at the church Agape were amazing; they served tirelessly and were always so welcoming. While I was there I got to help lead worship, clean/ organize the church, prayer walk through the Red Light District, Muslim ministry, street evangelism, and helped with church events. The work we did was extremely relational, we were able to pour into the leaders of the church and encourage them in their ministry. The display of relationship being at the center of ministry was eye opening. Often we can get so focused on the everyday checklists and miss the opportunity to love on the people around us. Seeing how relational Europeans are shaped my life. They inspired me to focus on those around me and truly love everyone where they are at in life, because that is what Jesus did. God stirred a passion for Amsterdam in my heart and I haven’t been able to forget the people of the city. I was reminded how to serve with no ulterior motives, and how to continue to bring Jesus to a place that so obviously rejects Him. This trip reminded me of what the life of a Christian it all about, bridging the gap between heaven and earth by loving people unceasingly.
My team worked closely with the youth pastor of the church, David. This is when the craziness and irony of the trip comes in. One Sunday a friend from my team told me someone she knew from the church (Agape) was from Canada. Me, thinking Canada is a super large place and I wouldn’t know who this girl is, I just thought, “Oh, that’s cool” and carried on. Long story short; Canada clearly isn’t that large because I actually grew up with this girl. She went to the same family camp as me and we would hang out during the summer! She had married someone from Amsterdam, and mentioned how her sister also married someone who lives in Amsterdam too named David. The same David we had been working with all week…you can’t make this stuff up. I can always count on God to place a sense of familiarity in a completely foreign place. I know I went on that trip for a reason and those people were a huge part of it.
 
 
This year I am going to Amsterdam with my church, Grace City. To top off the madness of my Canadian/Amsterdam ties, David is the pastor we are working with on this trip.  I am ALWAYS amazed by how God works. I believe all of these things are not coincidence but simply a confirmation of Gods passionate desire for community among is followers.
 
 
With all of this being said I would love to partner with you on this missions trip! Please prayerfully consider if you would partner with me in prayer, and/or financially. Whether you choose to donate $1, $5, or $100, every dollar helps! You can read a brief summary of what we will be doing by clicking the link below! If you do choose to partner with me financially donate at: https://hopestash.com/shelbysparkman
 
Thank you for your prayers and support.
Love you all!

Home to me is where my family is. Now that my family is not in my actual home I have had to find a "home away from home" and that has been a mission and a half! The first month of college has made my life feel like the hunger games (impossible to survive). I should be loving being in the city and being able to attend such good school. Sadly lately I have been feeling the opposite. All the work and stress is becoming overwhelming. Which makes me uneasy about school and my decision. That needs to change. I am here for a reason, I know that. Wherever you are, you are there for a reason. Make it count. The hardest part about moving out on your own is finding the feeling of  being at home in your new city. I am sure all you new students feel me when I say that. The "home" feeling seems to fade away and that is never good. The best thing I have found to counter act that is finding a church. My old church in Orangeville was my home away from home. I knew it like the back of my hand and knew all of the people there like I knew my own family. So trying to find that again has been a transition. I didn't find that in my last town (mainly because I wasn't looking) but now I am, more than ever. I found a church that seems hopeful. "Homey" you could say, even though "homey" is not even a word. Since that I have been more comfortable and hopeful of my decision. There are still major dilemmas I face but knowing I have a place I can go and refuel my spirit is so encouraging. I encourage you to find a home outside of home. Weather it's a church or a school group. Finding a place where you can make a family. A family you choose. The ones you know you can rely on because those are the people you want around you. Not saying this will make it all better, but it will make it bearable. 

When I'm feeling super down I will toss on Verticle Church Band, super encouraging music. Check out the link below to listen to their music. They are super cool check out what they are all about on their website. http://verticalchurchband.com 

School is just around the corner and it’s off to a new city for me. This move scared me since I’m living in a big city and it is my first time on my own. It’s all exciting and a blessing but I can’t help but get nervous. Could you blame me? Instead of staying in dorms like a normal college student I am living in a condo for my first “legit” away from home move. My school doesn’t offer dorms so I am having to do more than I ever imagined in order to be prepared. For instance the chair I got for my desk rolls more than a kid who found a tall hill. Maybe I should say more than my child self would roll down a hill I found. Now looking back I know I was a weird child. I sit down and end up halfway across my room and struggle rolling back to the desk without hitting anything (I always hit something). So naturally I have given up hope and have resorted to sitting on my floor. That’s do able and a good problem but still annoying. Other than that I am loving my place more than life. I am in a condo downtown and my roomie and I keep saying it feels like we live in a hotel. Zack and Cody’s suite life status. Anyways, so much has been going on but it is all exciting changes. Just thought I would take this time to express how good it is to stop and thank God for the things going good in your life. Instead of going to God when I need his help, I am learning I love thanking him for his help more than anything. Feeling alone in a big city is inevitable but knowing God is always there and has you there for a reason is comforting and all the more worth it. 


Thank you God for placing me here and I pray you give me the strength to pursue the plans you have for me. I thank you for giving me this opportunity and choosing me for the plans you have in store. 

Okay I found a gem this time! This guy is a total underdog and I love that. I am not even sure how I stumbled upon him but I am beyond happy that I did. It may have something to do with the fact that i've spent 2 straight hours on youtube and 8 tracks. I have a life I swear. So if his voice isn't enough to fall in love with him let me make you aware that he is from England. So yes, he has a british accent. SWOON. I'm 150% in love with him at the moment. So it only makes sense that I share my new found love with all of you. Enjoy, I know you will. 

James 1:2-4
2 Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

Sometimes I find myself in really odd situations. Most of the time it's because I'm young and spontaneous. Other times it's because people make mistakes that affect other people, not only themselves. When troubles come I like to either steer clear and ignore it, or greet it head on (not greet in a good way). It's hard to take the troubling times and turn it into something positive. The worst is when your in the middle of a bad time and someone says to look on the bright side. What bright side? Oh, you must mean the one where I feel completely hopeless. Totally a bright side, I forgot! Usually I want to a.) say some not so nice words, OR b.) say some other not so nice words. I try my best to stay positive but without someone to rely on it's nearly impossible. 

After reading this verse today I really felt that I need to take refuge in those troubling times and endure the hardships. Having faith in God even in the hardest times is the most important weapon. I know this because I have bee gifted not so nice opportunities to be in HORRIBLE situations that advertise no hope at all. Enduring the hardest times often forges the strongest faith. I know this from experience. Next time you are stressing about something remember; this can be a chance for your endurance to grow, and a possibility for your faith to be made complete. Don't waste that opportunity. 

If you like singers with the voice of angels you will love James Vincent McMorrow. He makes super chill music that is perfect for studying, or just wanting to lay around and be super lazy with an album on repeat. His unique folk/indie sound is so refreshing.  The fact that he is from Dublin, Ireland is simply icing on the cake. I’ve been listening to him for about a year or two now and he is my go to for those nights I cannot get to sleep. His voice is is like a sleeping pill for me. Not because it’s boring, only because he sounds so soothing. His voice is a God send.

My top 2 songs:
-And If My Heart Should Somehow Stop 
-Higher Love

So if you don't want to miss out on some crazy talent check out the links and listen to the song posted below! You know you want to...
http://jamesvmcmorrow.com
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNYIEJ5Cwl2B0PfRD9kgZHw

I have been MIA and this is my apology. I owe you at least this. So story short I have awesome luck (sarcasm) and my laptop stopped working so that sucked big time. I had no way to post for a month basically so not only was I not able to blog and felt guilty I was pretty much going through hardcore laptop relapse. On top of my laptop acting real funky I have been completing high school and cramming for finals. Note how I used the term cramming, because that is literally what I do. I cram. It’s my way of life. I like to wait until the very last possible moment to do things like school work or, oh I don't know...studying for a huge exam! DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME KIDS. Nothing changes though, that is every year. So yeah that's a thing. Now I have a new laptop (courtesy of my lovely father for grad). So I hate to say it but you guys are stuck with my blogs again. Since I spend 90% of my time in my room on my computer I will have all the time in the world. Now reading that I feel as though you might think I have no social life what so ever. I ensure you I do, I just rounded up generously for that percentage (I love dramatic value). I am not entirely sure on what I will be blogging but I assure you I will be blogging. 

Please comment below on things you would like to see me blog about if you have any ideas! 

I'll be back,
shelby

There are people who you meet that bring out the best in you. I found myself changing small things about my character when I am around different people. I hated that about myself. So lately, I've been stopping that trend. Punting it over a bridge like Ron Burgundy did in Anchorman. I have a life outside of watching movies I swear! One main thing I've done is hangout more often with the people who allow me to act like myself around. This helps you really become accustomed to being yourself, naturally. When it comes to looking for guys I have always been EXTREMELY cautious because I sometimes do change my ways to fit in with different people. Instead of being the typical teen girl who had dated a bunch of guys, I was that girl that never had a high school relationship worthy of a Taylor Swift song. THANK THE LORD FOR THAT. I think this has also helped my parents a lot…YOU'RE WELCOME! Note the fact that I have still never had a boyfriend. Let's get this clear though people, It isn't because I haven’t had the chance. I have. It is because I have only met a few guys I feel compatible with. I will not waste time and emotions on a relationship I don't see going anywhere. Also, I don't want to rush all of that either. 

 That's where I find the biggest difference between most girls my age and myself. I have high standards set because I know if I don't set them I'll settle. Settling is just not an option for me, and it shouldn't be one for you either. A main thing I do when talking to guys I am interested in is see if they bring out the best in me. Ex. If I am able to be the typical happy go lucky Shelby that is somewhat too sarcastic (usually too sarcastic for people) while also being able to have the serious conversations I love having! ALSO! I am completely OBSESSED with the movie Nacho Libre, so I always need to make sure the guy loves it as much as I do. If they don't, I usually stop it right there. Worst part is I’m not even kidding. More importantly, do I like the person I am when I'm around them? That has been a HUGE eye-opener for me. So ladies and gentleman, once you find that person that allows you to act like yourself an brings out the best in you, don't let go. Those matches are hard to find. Usually, one does not take relationship advice from someone who has never had a "legit" relationship. I know. In this case though, I have witnessed many awesome relationships and some horrible ones. I mean HORRIBLE. Friends constantly come to me with problems and sometimes I feel like Dr. Phil. I kind of love it secretly. Shh, don't tell anyone. So take my advice and see what happens. Instead of looking for the hottest guy or girl look for the one who allows you to be the person you want to be. More importantly look for the one that you don't have to alter yourself for. This applies to friends as well. If you find you are hanging out with people you don’t really “connect” with in terms of you want to be, look elsewhere. You might just be looking in the wrong places. You deserve to be able to act like the person you truly are or want to be with people who encourage and support you. 


XOXO,
SHELBY 

Change is hard. It is, I know it. Everyone has their own things that need to stay the same. Those things can be just silly traditions, friends, family, etc. I used to need everything to stay the same, like christmas morning at my own house, easter egg hunts on easter morning, and more serious things like school and friends. Once my parents  got divorced I thought nothing would be the same. I was going to move away, get new friends, get a new house, eventually get a new step family and so many more things. That really sucked. Like BADLY. The sad thing is people are only temporary and they will change. Realizing that and accepting it really was a struggle for me. Finding my place in the town I live in now is still a struggle at times.  The hardest change was the family. Not only did they change, but some left me when I needed them most. I say this not for pity, but for some of you people reading this so you know you are not alone. Trying to figure out why that was, is impossible. I realized trying to figure out why people do things and change is impossible cause half the time they don't know the answer themselves. Learning how to go on and be a happy person was challenging because it felt like I had lost everything. I felt that the world was changing around me and I was stuck. Now that I look at everything, I realize I was wrong. I hadn't lost everything from the change, I gained everything. I gained step siblings,  a step dad,  grandparents and the rest of their family. I also made amazing friends and have truly found myself. God tests us at our hardest times. Sometimes I feel like he has a bowl of popcorn and just enjoys watching us act like complete morons. (I'd do that)  Yet He always works it out in the end. The thing I learned is He cares more about how you act after you have gone through change, rather than how you were before it. Going through everything I did allowed me to live a different way and eventually learn what I really wanted. So yes, change is hard but it also can be the best thing. So if you are moving, starting at a new school, or just realizing people are temporary and they do change, I hope you can learn that change is good. I know I know, at the time is SUCKS BIG TIME. I've been there, but the end result is something you will love. I know this is cliché but turn to God. When you feel like the change is too much. Pray that he will give you the strength to get through. I allowed the change to get the best of me and I wasn't myself. If there is one thing I hope for you, it is that you read this and know you are not alone in the change. Feel free to email me or DM me on twitter if you ever need someone to talk to. Remember, People change, Things change, God NEVER Changes. 

xoxo,
Shelby 

P.S sorry for not posting is like 9876543456789 years